So here's the situation...my brother Scott is getting married in November to a lovely gal named Erin and the wedding is being held in Florida where they both reside.
Scott gave me the great honour of being his Best Man at the wedding and I couldn't be more thrilled. As a big man I can't think of anything more enjoyable than dressing up in a tuxedo under the blistering Florida sun. I just hope its machine washable.
I'm kidding of course. I look good all the time but I'm even better looking when I'm dressed up. Plus, it has always been my understanding that weddings are a great place to meet single women. It's the perfect atmosphere. Here they are watching someone they know, in love, having their big day. It'll be like single women at a male strip show and I'm the last dancer for them to grab on to.
Of course this plan goes right out the window if there are no single women. I know the invitations have already gone out. I wonder if it's too late for me to send out a few. I'll send a couple to those girls at the local bar who sell beer in their bikinis. I'll walk up and down the beaches of Siesta Key and Longboat Key handing them out to young hotties in thongs. Or I could head over to the Magic Kingdom in Orlando and pass out invites for a ride on the new "Bundy Mountain Love Experience".
No, I'm sure I'll just be too darn busy making sure things go as smoothly as possible. I'll be looking after my brother, the minister, the toasts, dancing with my aunts who don't have dates and at the end of the night I'll have to hook up with one of the ladies on the kitchen staff. I just hope she shaves.
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