The Hap Hap Happiest Christmas

Traditionally I suppose Thanksgiving is the time to give thanks and be grateful for what you have but to be honest, this past Thanksgiving I wasn’t feeling particularly happy about what was happening in my life or the life of my family.

This year for the most part had been one hellish roller-coaster ride for me and my family. Perhaps I was just blinded by all the negative things to see the good stuff that happened in 2014 but to be honest, the bad news was so great that I didn’t feel much like smiling or enjoying the good times.

The most important man in my life, my father, has been dealing with a deadly form of cancer since the summer and the prognosis seemed bleak at best. I’m not a doctor but I suppose that’s still the case but luckily there has been some good news just in time for Christmas.

With cancer moving from his only remaining kidney into his lungs, you can imagine it was a very depressing summer and autumn. We did our best to put on a brave face and my father has done an amazing job of remaining positive and was willing to fight this bastard of a disease as best he could.

I’m not an overly religious person so I’m not going to say divine intervention has played a part in the latest results. I truly believe modern medicine has come a long way with advancements to prolong the lives of those stricken with this affliction. It was very welcome news a few weeks ago when my dad visited the doctor at the cancer clinic and was told that there were no new lesions or growth in his lungs and kidney. What was even more amazing was the fact the existing tumors had shrunk “significantly”. We knew full well going into the treatment with these expensive chemo pills that it wasn’t a cure. All we were hoping for was more time with my dad and to give him a chance. It appears as though that will be the case.

With any luck the pills will continue to do their job and keep the cancer in check for a while, thus allowing my father to enjoy more time on this earth and for those of us who love him, more time to irritate and annoy his grumpy ass. Any extra time and every day is a blessing.

On a personal level, the end of 2014 has also brought some unexpected but long sought after love into my life. That’s right, I met someone.

The funny thing is; I’ve known her for well over 30 years. We went to high school together and have always been friends.  Come to find out she actually had a thing for me in high school but as usual I was so oblivious to the signs and just a typical silly school boy that I didn’t even notice. I was too busy playing football and trying to be cool to see her for more than just a great friend and someone to share good times and laughs with.

We kept in touch and for the last three years or so chatted often online. Not surprisingly with my track record, I remained unaware of her feelings for me. I had dated several women this year with no love connection and perhaps with all that was happening with dad my heart really wasn’t into it. And then one day while chatting with her, something finally clicked in me. I realized that this woman and friend would be an amazing person to date and pursue a relationship with. Of course, that all depended on whether or not she still had any interest in me. As it turns out, she was still interested. 

Officially we’ve been dating for three weeks but since we’ve known each other for so long and been talking so much in recent years, it feels as though we’ve been together for much longer. We were able to skip that whole “getting to know each other” phase since we already knew each other so well. It’s safe to say she is my best friend and we get along so well. We are always laughing and having a good time together. We just click and are comfortable with each other. I know my family will grow to love her as much as I do.

So 2014 was bloody awful for the most part but some amazing news and events at the tail end of the year has turned the whole year around. This will truly be the happiest Christmas for me in a very long time.

Life Gets In The Way

Summer highlight having the family together in Canada.

 The summer isn’t officially over yet but having moved into September it can definitely be classified as being on life support. This has truly been the summer from hell. Easily one of the hardest summers of my life and that’s saying a lot for me.

Going into the summer I was feeling great. I had lost over 170 pounds, was working out daily, work was going well, family was doing fine and the thought of feeling the heat of the sun on my face again was something I was looking forward to. The only thing that didn’t look promising was my love life which in all honesty hasn’t been much to cheer about for a very long time.

I don’t mind sharing my own personal thoughts and life story with all of you because I like to think I’m a pretty open book. There are some family things that will always remain as private as possible. I try to walk a fine line between being honest and protecting those I love.

The one big reason why I’ve been neglecting my blog this summer revolves around my father who was diagnosed with kidney cancer and not the kind that can be cured. It’s Stage 4 renal cell carcinoma and unfortunately it has moved out of his only remaining kidney and into his lungs.

Quite simply, it devastated us when we learned the news as I’m sure it does for most families. My dad is my best friend and the toughest man I’ve ever known and he’s wearing a brave face through all of this but knowing what he is facing in the months ahead scares me and I’m sure behind his brave face he is also feeling some fear. But I made a decision to spend as much time as I can with him and keep life as normal as possible which I think I’ve been pretty successful at doing.

The support of family and friends has been pretty amazing to see and I know my dad and mom both appreciate the kindness of those who have closed ranks around us at this time.

Of course with all that is happening in my family it has taken up a lot of my free time which I’m perfectly fine with. But my plans to be more active this summer by golfing more and walking and running more has suffered. I haven’t golfed nearly as much this summer as I have in past years and as far as my health goes, the summer has taken a bit of a toll on that as well.

I postponed my gym membership for July and August which means a lot of the progress I had made last winter with my weight lifting and fitness has been lost. I’m still in pretty decent shape but I’ve lost a lot of the muscle tone I had built and I’m sure some of that muscle has also turned into fat again. Thus, my weight has increased some this summer. That’s not to say I’ve ballooned up again but I’d say I gained about 20 pounds at one point.

Over the last couple of weeks I’ve been trying to ease back into my old routine again and the pounds have started dropping again and I’ve returned to my original goal weight. Come the middle of September my gym membership will kick in and I hope to be back pumping iron and burning more fat.

My love life this summer has been interesting at times. Perhaps I should just dedicate a whole other blog to that subject as it’s kinda interesting how times have changed since I used to date years ago.

So I’m sort of back writing again but as usual I’m sure life will throw me some curveballs and I won’t be able to write as often as I’d like but I’ll do my best.

Little Balls For Cancer

Mark, Lyle, Andy and Bundy strike a pose

For the eleventh straight year I recently took part in the Terry Fox Golf Tournament and although we remained dry, everyone had a bad hair day thanks to the gusty winds.

The forecast heading into the day was calling for wind gusts up to 80 km/h, rain and cool temperatures. Luckily we only saw a few brief drops of the wet stuff and thanks to being dressed for the day it wasn't all that chilly after all. However the winds didn't disappoint which made for some tricky club selections.

OK, the truth is we usually try to win the tournament as I think we've won it at least four times in the past but there were a couple of teams that may have brought in a few ringers which meant our chances were very slim. But other than bragging rights, the real reason we play is to raise money for the cause...cancer research.

Well, we didn't win. In fact we struggled all day long in the best ball game and eventually finished at one over par. It's the first time in eleven years that we didn't have a single birdie the entire round. We weren't the only team to struggle.

It was amazing how many times we'd hit what appeared to be an excellent tee shot only to have the wind swallow the ball up and drop it or move it no where near the trajectory should have taken it. Mother Nature had our number and all we could do was keep our hats from blowing off and shake our heads in disbelief.

For the second year in a row our team consisted of Mark Adams, Lyle Williams, Andy Koetstra and myself. We had a lot of laughs as we struggled along and over $8000 was raised for the cause. I don't know if they'll be having the tournament next October but if they are, you can bet we'll be there again.