Pet Peeve #146

On my way to work this morning I decided I had just enough time to stop into the local Mac’s Convenience store to grab a copy of the Toronto Sun newspaper.

Normally, even on a busy morning, I’m usually in and out in less than a minute. The newspapers are just inside the door right next to the checkout.

A quick scan of the barcode and exchange of a toonie and some change in return and I’m out the door back on the road with my morning news fix in my possession.

Seems like a harmless enough detour and transaction right? Not on this day!

I walked in the door and there was an older man at the counter and another guy about my age with a coffee in his hand waiting to pay for it. I grabbed the paper and took my place in line. I shouldn’t be waiting more than a few moments for these guys to pay and be on their way.

I give a quick glance at the clock and its 7:40am. I’m about 10 minutes from work and I have to be there for 8 o’clock but I usually like to be there at least 10 or 15 minutes early to let the guy who worked the night shift go a bit early.

I’m still standing in line. What the heck is taking so long? I peer around the shoulder of "coffee guy" and I see what’s happening. The old fellow has decided that this is the time of day when he should be checking his lottery and scratch tickets and cashing in his winning Nevada tickets. Are you kidding me?

Come on buddy! You may be retired and have all the time in the world to have junior behind the counter ringing your $2 and $5 winners through the machine but some of us are in a hurry. He couldn’t care less. He even pulls out an old change purse and dumps coins out to pay for more tickets while slowly counting enough to get the right amount.

The wait becomes painful and unbearable as I glance at the clock and five minutes has passed. It’s decision time. Do I put the paper back and just go? Do I give him a few more seconds or do I just toss the guy my toonie and tell him to keep the change?

Long story short, it was actually a combination of the choices. The retiree finally seems satisfied with his winnings and is slowly filling his change purse back up when coffee guy tosses some money on the counter and tells junior to keep the change. I quickly follow and do the same thing as the gentleman with the lottery tickets slowly exits the store without a care in the world or any idea of the delay he’s caused.

I made it to work before my shift started but I had to run some yellow lights and go a little faster than I normally would along the way.

Here’s a suggestion to anyone else who might find themselves in a similar situation as "Old Man Lottery". If you’re retired, do your business after 9am when most working people have made their way to work. Your lottery tickets won’t depreciate in value if you wait a couple of extra hours. And at the same time you won’t anger working folks who make a quick pit stop while on the way to their jobs.

Ya Know What Grinds My Gears?

I don’t think I'd be wrong in saying that pretty much everyone has some Pet Peeves that annoys the “h-e-double-hockey-sticks” out of them. It could be the slightest most obscure thing but every time you see, hear or experience it, it’s as exasperating as someone dragging their fingernails down a chalkboard.

This is one of those subjects that can be continued and updated from time to time as day to day we’re reminded of new annoyances that we might have forgotten about. In the future I may talk about others that didn’t make this list. Here are a few off the top of my head to get us started.

Using You’s
Oh baby this is a big time pet peeve of mine. Nothing drives me more insane than when I’m sitting in a restaurant with family or friends and the waitress comes along and asks, “How are you’s today” or “Can I get you’s some drinks to start” or the always popular “Are you’s ready to order?” Aaarggghh! I am so tempted to reply with “we’s fine” or “yes we’s is”, but I just can’t do it. I'd rather hear them say "How ya'll doing?" It isn't much better but it's less annoying to me. Please, if you’s is guilty of using you’s would you’s please stop immediately. Thank you’s.

Lead Foot Ladies
You know who you are. These are the women drivers who put the gas pedal through the floorboards of their vehicle and nearly or sometimes do cause accidents through their aggressive driving techniques. Rarely a day goes by when I’m not tailgated and passed by a woman driver exceeding the speed limit.

This isn’t just limited to young female drivers. Just the other day I had two women over 30 (one in her 60’s at least) ride my ass and then pass without signals only to speed away. I was doing 90 km/h in an 80 km/h zone and I felt like I was standing still. I realize that not all women drivers are like this and men can be just as guilty but more and more I’ll see someone driving this way and before I get a good look at them I’ll say, “I bet it’s a woman” and 9 times out of 10…it usually is.

Debit Addicts
In this ever changing world, more and more people are moving away from carrying a lot of cash on them and instead choosing to use their debit cards. I’m one of those people. However, I won’t use it for one small inexpensive item. How many times have you been stuck behind someone in line at a store trying to use their debit card to buy something that costs 99 cents?

If they were quick about it I could forgive them but when they seem to take forever or their card isn’t working properly anymore and they’re forced to swipe the card 4 or 5 times…that gets me a little annoyed. For the love of God…carry at least 10 bucks on you at all times for these small purchases and save us all some time.

Dog Droppings
I love dogs but what I can’t stand are lazy dog owners who can’t pick up after their pets. There’s nothing more revolting than walking along the sidewalk and seeing the remnants of Fido’s last stroll.

What’s making it worse are lazy owners who let their dogs run free in public parks, soccer fields and cemeteries to get some exercise only to leave a pile of Rover’s finest stewed butt droppings as a present. Unsuspecting visitors who will be scraping it off their shoes and cleats in the near future. If you don’t like picking up after your dog…then DON’T OWN ONE! Carry a plastic bag in your pocket and keep him on a leash unless you’re in a designated dog park. Oh, and pray you don’t see me if you can’t follow these simple rules. I’ve had enough of it.

Gum Gum Dumb Dumb
At least three times this past year I stepped in some disrespectful persons disgusting, discarded chewing gum. First off, I think chewing gum is unattractive to begin with. To see someone gnawing away on a piece and looking like a cow chewing its cud looks atrocious no matter who’s doing it.

Now I realize people are naturally lazy and it’s so much easier to fire a used piece of gum out the window of a car or drop it on the ground then it is to locate a suitable garbage container or piece of paper to roll it up in. Hey, I’m as lazy as the next person at times but even these people must hate having to scrape someone else’s bubble gum off the underside of their $150 Nike’s. So why do they do it? It baffles me. These people need to have gum matted in their hair as punishment.

Restaurant Booths
As a hefty man I have to pick and choose the restaurants I visit not only by the quality of food they provide but also by the seating arrangements offered. There are a few places that only offer seating in the form of booths which is fine, provided they’re big enough to accommodate me. That is not the case in a lot of places.

When I make a reservation, I always explain that I need a table with chairs so I know I’ll have room. It’s a bit embarrassing but this is the way it has to be. I take it as a slap to the face and it is a little upsetting when the solution suggested by a restaurant employee is to place a chair at the end of a booth, thus placing me in the aisle or walkway. As if I wasn’t already feeling uncomfortable.

So if that is the only solution, I will usually leave. If I have to wait for a table and chairs to come open, I will. Fortunately most people who have dined out with me in the past know how I feel about this and are accepting. One thing I know for sure is that I’m not the only person who has to live through these awkward moments. And don’t get me started on the small seats in stadiums, hockey arenas and theatres.

Of course there are plenty of other things that grind my gears and when I think of more I’ll be sure to bring them to you. Also, if you have any, feel free to leave a comment. I’d love to hear them.

Learn To Drive Will Ya!

I don’t think I’m telling you something you didn’t already know when I say that there are a lot of really bad drivers on the road. It’s not that they can’t keep their vehicle on the street; they just don’t know the rules of the road.

The simplest rules are forgotten most often and unfortunately this lack of knowledge or the sheer lack of common sense of some road warriors will be the cause of many accidents.

Now, I’m not about to make this a male versus female issue even though the majority of the offenders in my experience are women. While that may be the case, men and young drivers are just as guilty.

I’m also not going to harp on those with a lead foot. I myself have been known to creep over the speed limit from time to time, especially on the highway. The fact that I think the speed limit on the major highways should be raised from 100 to 120 kilometres per hour is just my opinion. I love to travel in the U.S. because the speed limits on the Interstates are higher than they are here in Canada and you can actually get where you’re going in much better time. Not to mention the traffic seems to flow better as well for some reason.

This discussion I am more concerned with some simple regulations of the road that people just don’t have a grasp of and I’d rather see the police start ticketing these individuals rather than someone who is 10 or 15 km’s over the limit. So here are my current driving pet peeves:

1. Turning into the Wrong Lane at an Intersection
I’m sure you’ve all seen this before and this one drives me crazy. Picture yourself sitting at a stop light waiting to turn left onto a four lane road (two lanes in each direction). There is also a car waiting across the intersection facing you waiting to turn right to travel in the same direction as you. The light turns green. What should the drivers do? According to the law you each turn into the closest lane. That means you turn left into the passing lane while the car facing you turns right into the curb lane. That’s how it should work but I would say nine times out of ten one of the cars cuts across into the far lane cutting me off. At this point my horn, hand gestures and foul mouth all go into action. Where are the police when you need them?

2. Driving in the Passing Lane
This one really steams me sometimes, especially when the car is going slow. Once again you’re traveling down a four lane road. The right lane is the driving lane and the left is the passing lane. I know this might come as a shock to some, but they call it the passing lane for a reason. You go out there to pass someone and then you pull back over to the right into the driving lane and continue. You don’t stay out there and keep putting along. The folks who really tick me off are the people who stay in the passing lane because they’re eventually going to turn left onto another road. Get the hell over until you’re almost at your turn. Surely to goodness you can change lanes half a kilometre away. You don’t need to drive 5km in the passing lane before you turn. Where are the police when you need them?

3. Passing on the Right
Along the lines of the last one, possibly as a result of someone driving in the passing lane you may have to pass on the right if they’re going too slow in the wrong lane. That is the only time I condone this. However, recently I was coming to a stop light in town and was preparing to make a left turn. Some asshole in a truck came flying up beside me on the right and swerved in front of me cutting me off and jammed on the brakes for the light. I was pissed off to say the least. So for the remainder of the light, I had one hand on the horn and the other flipping the bird. Road rage? Perhaps. Pointless? Also perhaps but it makes me feel better and in a situation like that, that’s all I care about. Where are the police when you need them?

By the way, I have to give thanks to my brother for teaching me to use the horn. He does it all the time in Florida. Maybe it’s an American thing. It accomplishes nothing but it feels so much better to help release the anger. After all, like the Hulk, you wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.

4. Merging Into Traffic…You Don’t Have the Right of Way
I see this all the time as I’m traveling along the 401 highway. I’ll be motoring along in the driving lane (right lane) and as I approach an area where traffic can enter the highway I can see cars preparing to merge onto the motorway. Normally most drivers would move over to the left passing lane and allow those cars entering the highway an easier and clear spot for them to do so. However, sometimes the traffic is thick and you can’t move over. These idiots feel that they have the right of way to merge when actually they don’t. They will force their way on to the highway and nearly cause an accident or at the bare minimum make the oncoming traffic hit the brakes to avoid them. What they should have done is waited for the traffic to pass and the lane to clear before proceeding. They do NOT have the right of way. Where are the police when you need them?

5. Not Using the Ramp to Accelerate to Speed
Going hand in hand with number four is this one. Drivers who instead of using the on ramp to get up to speed before entering traffic, merge immediately while only doing half the speed they should be. Meanwhile, the traffic coming up behind this “tool” is forced to weave around or brake to avoid hitting said “tool.” Use the damn on ramp for its intended purpose. They make it long for a reason. Where are the police when you need them?

6. Approaching an Intersection with the Stop Lights Out
Finally I come to one that is near the top of my list of most annoying ignorant driver screw-ups. This has been a common one this summer as we’ve had a number of storms that have caused power outages at intersections. As you approach an intersection and you notice that the power to the stop lights has been interrupted and they aren’t working, what should you do? In this case you don’t just go flying through the lights if you happen to be travelling along the busier road. That’s a great way to cause an accident. Instead, you treat the intersection as a Four Way Stop.

That’s right; you must come to a complete stop and allow the car or cars to the right of you that were at the intersection first to proceed before you continue your journey. It’s really quite simple but once again, we have a lot of people driving today that either have forgotten what they learned or just don’t care and that’s why people are dying on our roads. Where are the police when you need then?

People can talk about drivers using cell phones or speeders causing accidents. I won’t deny that those situations can lead to fender benders or worse but I bet there are just as many accidents caused by people who don’t know the rules of the road rather than by those who choose not to follow the rules.

If any of the above situations sound like something you may be guilty of, I hope I’ve helped to refresh your memory and perhaps next time you find yourself in one of these situations, you’ll remember to do things properly. Happy Driving!

Oh, and to answer the question I kept asking about the police…check a Tim Horton’s parking lot.