Sex, Candy and Pumpkins

Does anyone else remember when Halloween was just about dressing up and going door to door with friends begging for free candy? Don’t get me wrong, for the kids, I’m sure it’s still pretty much the same as it was when I was a boy but I guess things and perceptions change when you get older.

As an adult, it seems as though the event has taken on a different focus. You might even say it’s a more adult themed focus.

I’m sure when I was too young to notice there were adults who’d dress up and go to house parties or the local bars and have fun but I don’t recall seeing the types of costumes we see today back then. The costumes our parents and grandparents wore were, shall I say, more wholesome or traditional. Perhaps there were risqué costumes in the early and mid-1900’s but by today’s standards they’re exceedingly tame to say the least.

Oh sure the wee little children going door to door are still dressed up as cute characters that look adorable but the older kids and young teens seem to be influenced by our increasing culture of sex sells. I suppose there were probably girls dressing as Madonna back in the 80’s and wearing bras and panties but certainly not in my neighbourhood. Of course in Canada, quite often we had to wear our snowsuits under our costumes to keep us warm while trick or treating. Now we’re getting the Britney Spears and Lady Gaga impersonators wearing as little as possible even in the cold weather. What’s even more shocking is how their parents let them walk out the door looking like that.

I’m no prude but there are age appropriate costumes that should be worn. I have no trouble whatsoever with college aged girls or adults showing skin and dressing in sexy costumes. When you’re an adult it’s totally different and judging by some of the costumes I’ve seen over the years at bars and parties, the older girls get a lot of satisfaction of dressing up in as little as possible for both the shock factor and to get the boys all worked up. Heck, if I was a hot young woman, I’d probably do the same thing. I’m sure they enjoy teasing the guys.

As a man I can appreciate that. I’m certainly not opposed to having a look. After all, it’s not my daughter, sister or wife showing all that skin. But as appealing as that is to look at, I still prefer to think back to the memories of my youth.

Now we’re not talking Norman Rockwell type memories but still we had some good times at Halloween as kids. Much like my adult version, I wasn’t a small child and therefore my costumes compensated for this. The one costume I clearly recall wearing was an Old King Cole outfit from the nursery rhyme. It was a purple robe and crown and I had my pipe and bowl. I didn’t have my fiddlers three however. I think my mother made it for me.

For many years my mom was very popular with the local kids. She’d make candy apples. One year I even remember her burning herself quite badly while dipping the apples into the hot candy coating. She still has the scar on her hand where she was burnt. I know most of the kids in the neighbourhood loved them so much that they’d go directly to our house first, bypassing all others, to make sure they got one.

A few years later some sick and twisted individuals decided to start putting razor blades in apples so mom figured it was best to stop making them as parent’s stopped trusting any food that wasn’t factory sealed. I can’t say I blame them and I’m sure mom was ready to give it up as well.

The one area in which I had very little skill was pumpkin carving. That didn’t stop me from trying though. I’d draw the face design on the pumpkin and then I’d place newspaper on the kitchen floor before the carving began. The face was passable but nothing award worthy. We used to clean the seeds out of the pumpkin and then mom would bake them in the oven for us to eat. I remember loving them back then but years later I tried them again and they just didn’t have that same flavour. Perhaps I’d outgrown my seed eating phase.

Trick or treating was a lot of fun as a kid but like so many other things, I grew up and lost that childlike enthusiasm for it. I didn’t lose the love for eating treats and things that aren’t good for me though. Some things are just too good to give up on.

Mission Accomplished

Who would have guessed at the start of the year that the feel good story of 2010 would come from a disaster over 2000 feet underneath a Chilean desert?

Yet here we are celebrating the human spirit as 33 courageous men battled everything from despair, starvation and darkness for 69+ days to not only survive but prove to the rest of mankind that miracles and good things can still happen.

The entire world watched and prayed from the moment a hand written note was pulled from the depths of our planet until the final miner took his first breath of freedom. This was truly one of those moments where everyone had to feel relief and elation with the outcome.

This incident could have ended badly as most of this type do but in a world where greed, power, politics, evil and petty interests are broadcast every day on the nightly news, wasn’t it great to witness something positive for a change?

No doubt the ordeal these miners faced from the moment the collapse happened and the dust settled three hours later to reveal their helpless situation until they found freedom was unimaginable. What a hopeless feeling they must have felt those early days. The physical and mental conditions were a test of their character.

The rescue itself was no small feat either and the crews who found them and ultimately saved them are all heroes. With so many things that could have gone wrong, they made all of the right moves to ensure that an already ugly situation didn’t get worse.

I couldn’t understand a word the miners or their families said when they were reunited but you didn’t need an interpreter to see the happiness, relief and love on their faces and in the tears they shed.

I have no doubt that before too long we’ll see this story being told on the big screen and in theatres around the world. But for those close to the story and the rest of us who watched the events unfold on TV, there was no emotional soundtrack or big name stars to keep us on the edges of our seats. This was a real, suspenseful human drama with a happy ending, just as everyone had hoped. And they all lived happily ever after.

Scary Movies For Halloween

The month of October is associated with many things. The baseball playoffs, football, leaves changing colours, Thanksgiving (in Canada) and Halloween. And what goes along with Halloween…scary movies of course.

This started me thinking about what movies I thought were frightening. It seems what was considered scary when I was a kid isn’t thought to be as terrifying by today’s kids. I suppose the same can be said about me with my dad’s generation.

My father has told me the story of him going to the movie theatre as a young lad and being scared while watching Abbot and Costello Meet Frankenstein. By today’s standards, or even 70’s & 80’s standards, that movie isn’t creepy at all but at the time it probably kept kids up at night.

Of course during my youth and even as a younger adult I enjoyed the odd chilling flick from time to time, although it isn’t my favourite genre.

I decided to give it some thought and I’ve come up with my personal list of scary movies of all-time. Some are full-fledged horror movies while others are more suspense flicks that kept me on the edge of my seat. Oddly enough, as scary and creepy as it was, Weekend at Bernie’s didn’t make my list.

Bundy’s Top Ten Scary Movies

10 – The Mist (2007)
Stephen King isn't the master of horror for no reason. Never has a foggy day been more terrifying. The ending alone was worth the ride. Well, the ride wasn't great for some.










9 – The Shining (1980)
This movie freaked me out and when you add in a Jack Nicholson's "Here's Johnny" or "All work and no play" lines, it made for a great movie. Oh ya, another movie based on a Stephen King novel.









8 – The Ring (2002)
I dare you to watch this movie and then pick up the phone when it rings. I bet you can't. Of course having the beautiful Naomi Watts starring in the movie helped to ease my suffering.









7 – Psycho (1960)
Norman Bates taught me to never stay at a family run motel or leave the door unlocked when taking a shower. Just ask Janet Leigh. Alfred Hitchcock set the bar high and is rarely topped.










6 – The Thing (1982)
As a youngster watching this movie, I was terrified. The film follows a crew stationed at an Antarctic base stalked by a shape-shifting alien. The guys head that sprouts legs was a bit unnerving.









5 – Silence of the Lambs (1991)
I don’t know what terrified me more…the cannibalism or never agreeing to put lotion on when asked to by a psychopath. If I didn't like eating liver before I watched this movie, I certainly woulnd't want to eat it after.








4 – Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)
I still remember watching this movie in the theatre as a teen and not wanting to go to sleep that night. Freddy might have come for me with his metal knife claws. This was no Edward Scissorhands. Wes Craven at his best.







3 – Alien (1979)
I’ve had an upset stomach before but nothing has ripped open my belly from the inside…yet. Do you think they have problems like this on the International Space Station and they just don't tell us?









2 – Jaws (1975)
This movie kept us from going in the water all summer in 1975. My dad assured me there were no fresh water sharks in Canada. It also produced one of the best lines in movie history, “We’re gonna need a bigger boat.”








And my Number 1 Scary Movie of All-Time…



1 – Exorcist (1973)
I thought I was having a bad day until I saw that poor girls head spinning, the vomit and Priests freaking out. Of course I watched it all from under my blanket. Pea soup anyone?

So there you go, my choices for scariest movies of all time. Enjoy the movies!

They're Only Boobs!

Why in this day and age is breastfeeding in public still such a taboo thing for some people?

There aren’t many things more natural than a mother allowing her child to quash those hunger pains by latching on to the homemade milk makers. Yet some people, or prudes as I like to call them, seem to think this is an activity that should only take place behind closed doors.

The majority of the time, you can’t see anything anyway, and believe me, I’ve tried. Of course I’m kidding because lets be honest, there’s nothing sexy or (pardon the pun) titillating in that situation. I’ve seen more skin and nipples protruding on the beach or just walking down the street. And even if you could see a nipple, is it really that big of a deal? I have nipples and in some cases, my boobs are bigger than some women’s, not that I’m proud of that.

Recently a woman in North Carolina was asked by a co-owner of a coffee shop to cover up while breastfeeding her baby. It wasn’t as if she removed her clothes in the store and let the kid suck away. As the woman described, “her head is covering whatever was open. I can’t imagine that anyone could see any skin…certainly not as much as what some of the teenagers run around in.” Even the popular social-networking website Facebook banned images of breastfeeding moms back in 2008.

OK, I’m not naïve. I realize that women’s breasts for whatever reason are a sexual lightning bolt for men. I myself have been known to look at the chest of a lady or two prior to making eye contact, although I wouldn’t technically call myself a “boob man.” Men don’t have them so obviously we’re fascinated by them but we’re also mature enough, I would think, to separate the sexual side from the functional side.

Not only is it natural but it’s also healthy for the child. According to the World Health Organization, Breastfeeding is the best source of nourishment for infants as it contains antibodies that help protect babies from common childhood illnesses, including diarrhea and pneumonia, the two primary causes of child mortality worldwide. It also reduces the risks of breast and ovarian cancer later in life while helping women return to their pre-pregnancy weight faster.

The WHO also says adults who were breastfed as babies often have lower blood pressure and cholesterol levels, as well as lower rates of obesity. Obviously I wasn’t breastfed as a child or not enough. I made up for it by eating a lot more in the years to follow.

So I say, don’t stare, sneer or complain when you see a woman breastfeeding her child in public. Let’s commend them for being good mothers and encourage others to feel comfortable enough to do the same. We need to embrace the breast and squeeze out those who are against it. I for one would like to see the day when young mothers can flop out in the food court at the mall when Junior gets hungry without feeling ashamed or fearing criticism. That’s the world I want to be a part of.

Terrorist Changes Mind

It sounds like a pretty good idea and if it works, maybe all of the inmates in our prisons will give it a try.

For those of you who don’t live in Canada and haven’t heard of the “Toronto 18”, I’ll give you a brief background. A group of 18 mostly young Islamic men decided to form a club. But it wasn’t like the “He-man Woman Haters Club” you might see on a black and white episode of The Little Rascals with Spanky and Alfalfa. They had picnics and camped in the woods and on the surface seemed like a harmless assembly of friends having a good time communing with nature.

However, things are not always as they appear to be and this group actually turned out to be and extremist Islamic terrorist group plotting amongst the evergreens to set off bombs in downtown Toronto, police stations, military bases and on Parliament Hill in Ottawa.

At any rate, the group wasn’t too bright and tried to purchase bomb making materials from the constabulary and eventually the majority of them were found guilty and sent to jail where the only attacks they’d be a part of would take place in the shower.

Now back to the pretty good idea I mentioned earlier. The 24 year old mastermind (I use that term loosely), Zakaria Amara, has now stated that he no longer believes in extremist Islamic ideology and therefore feels his life sentence should be reduced.

Of course to any freedom loving and educated individual who hears this idea, we have a good chuckle and then wish him an enjoyable and long stay at one of our better corrections complexes.

Under the often idiotic and perplexing Canadian legal system, this putz was actually allowed to argue this point in front of an appeals court. Luckily at least one of the three justices forced to listen to this crock of dog droppings took issue with the arguments.

Justice Michael Moldaver asked the most obvious question, “Why should we send a message to society that if you gave remorse we will forgive you? I’m hearing poor Mr. Amara but I’m thinking poor to the thousands of Canadians if his plot had worked.”

Amara’s lawyer is hoping to have the sentence reduced to 18-20 years citing the fact that his client is married, employed, has a child, went to college and is first-time offender. Honestly, does the lawyer really believe someone who appeared to have a pretty good life in this country should be given a break regardless of the fact that he had one moment of poor judgement? I mean come on! It’s not like he actually succeeded in killing thousands of people so he can’t be that bad! Right?

Maybe he has had second thoughts and finally come to realize what he thought was a worthy cause really wasn’t such a good thing and the life he had before having to rent out his body in exchange for cigarettes wasn’t such a bad thing after all.

What kind of precedence would this set if the appeals court falls for this baloney? Pretty soon the courts would be filled with rapists, murderers, pedophiles and every other scumbag behind bars confessing they’ve found God and changed their ways. Or maybe the ruling would only affect those losers who were just too stupid to get the job done. “I wanted to blow up the CN Tower but now I love everybody and know that killing all of those infidels, er, I mean wonderful fellow citizens was wrong.” To that I say, enjoy being the prison bitch you terrorist scum.