It's Either Gravy or the Grave

You don't have to be a rocket scientist to take one look at me and know I'm overweight. Okay, not just overweight, I'm freaking obese. No point in sugar coating it.

I don't know if it's hereditary or what but even as a young boy I was "big boned". I hate that term so I'm just going to use the word fat from here on in. I was called fat all my life so it must be the right word to use. And by the way, just a note to those who called me fat behind my back growing up, I know who you are and I've never forgotten. I guess you could say I'm like an elephant. Insert your own joke there.

Me at my heaviest. Christmas 2009

But this isn't about who I was. This is about who I hope to be and in fact, who I am becoming. Now I have no grand illusions about what my future holds. I never have been thin and I never will be but I am trying to get healthier. I'm 45 this year and I would like nothing better than to be around in another 20-30 years see my niece get married and be in good enough shape that I don't require a forklift to load me on to the plane to get there.

I've had nothing but bad luck with diets in the past so I try to avoid using that word. What I'm doing isn't really a "diet" it's more of a lifestyle change. And that is not something I ever thought I'd be able to do.

Food is a weakness of mine. I love food. Even more to the point, I love food that is not good for me. Potatoes, bread, pizza, fast food...you know the yummy goodness of which I'm referring to. I like all the foods that are usually forbidden on any weight-loss plan. Long story short, I love those fatty calorie filled goodies but obviously they don't like me. Correction...the amount that passes by my lips disagrees with me. And sadly I'm a finicky eater which means either I eat what I like or I don't eat at all.

This brings me to the situation that I was confronted with in the Fall of 2012. After having been diagnosed as a diabetic in March of that same year I knew that unless I made some kind of change to my eating habits and lifestyle it was possible that body parts might soon be surgically removed from my body until I eventually found myself with only a head and a big fat torso.

My doctor recommended to me that I was a prime candidate for gastric bypass surgery. And while I've never ruled that out, it wasn't something I was willing to do right away. I wanted to try and lose weight on my own. It's not that I'm afraid of the operation. I know people who have had it done and they've lost a great amount of weight and their lives have drastically improved. I just felt I could find enough will power inside of me to get the job done and at the very least get to a more manageable weight.

I've always been active in sports but in recent years my weight gain has pretty much ended that. All except golfing but even there I was forced to use a motorized golf cart to get me around the course instead of walking due to the pain associated with walking. My ankles and other joints would ache for days. But back to my original train of thought.

When I played football in high school I weighed 260 pounds. That's pretty big but I was a solid and well proportioned 260. I could run short distances pretty quickly. I played baseball 5-6 nights a week in my 20's but all the time I kept adding on the pounds. Fast forward to 2011. I hadn't been to my doctor in years except to be diagnosed with Sleep Apnea, another common condition for obese people. I also hadn't weighed myself in nearly 20 years so I had no idea what damage had been done from the decades of overeating and the sedentary lifestyle I had adopted simply because I didn't like being sore from getting exercise.

One day on a job site I spotted an industrial scale used to weigh large heavy loads before they were packed into trucks for shipping. I knew most household scales would be useless for me at this point. I knew I wasn't going to like the results if I stepped on but the curiosity was killing me. I had to know what damage I had done. Lets face it, nobody ever looks in the mirror and actually sees what others see. I stepped on expecting it to come back with a shocking reading of something like 350 pounds or so. My heart nearly stopped when the reading settled on 420 pounds. That wasn't possible I thought, but the numbers didn't lie.

Heaviest weight in August 2009

The next day I started trying to eat better and smarter but as in the past, it didn't last long and I fell back into my old habits. It wasn't until I was diagnosed with the diabetes and knowing what that can lead to that I realized this was my life I was wasting and possibly eating away. I had to make a change or at the very least die trying.

I began my changing immediately. It wasn't easy and I had to ease into it because the damage had been done and in order to get active and walking again I had to lose some initial weight. And I did. By the Fall of 2012 I was starting to walk short distances and eventually several kilometres at a time working up a good sweat and getting my heart rate up enough to start burning calories. I won't lie and say my food choices changed much but I did make some changes.

The biggest change I made was to stop drinking regular Coke and Pepsi. I would drink a lot every day. I didn't like the switch to diet pop but I have acquired a taste for it now. The foods I eat for meals are more or less the same however instead of filling my plate up 2 or 3 times for supper I'll fill it once and maybe get a tiny bit more if I haven't had much else during the day. I've cut way back on my night time snacking as well which I know has had a major impact on things. I've also started using the MyFitnessPal App on my iPad and iPhone to track everything that I eat and drink each day. I only allow myself a certain number of calories which allows my body to change and shed the pounds.

Along with the change in my eating I've also been walking regularly. I have another app called MapMyWalk which uses GPS and calculations based on my age and weight to determine how many calories I burn during my walks. I can see maps of where I've been and how many calories I burned during my trip. These two apps have really proven to be great motivators for me.

Left: December 2009             Right: May 2013

So where do I stand you might be wondering after starting at 418 pounds and feeling like there was no hope of ever breaking out of a nose dive towards an early death? As of today, eight months into an honest effort towards weight-loss, I am sitting at 321 pounds. I'm happy with what I've achieved so far but still not satisfied with my weight. I'm approaching the 100 pound milestone and mini-goal I set for myself. Ultimately I'd like to lose as much as I can but the goal I set for myself when I began was to try and get below my football playing weight. My goal is 250 pounds. If I'm able to make that weight, I'm sure I'll set a new goal. But I don't want to get ahead of myself. I take it day by day and week by week.

I feel great walking and I no longer ride a cart when I'm golfing. I walk the course and carry my clubs. Sure when I climb the big hills I get huffing and puffing but everyone does and it's a good sign that I'm working my body, raising my heart-rate and dropping more calories. Best of all, the feeling I get every time I finish a round of golf knowing that where I was just a year ago, gives me a great sense of pride in myself.

So here I sit feeling healthier and lighter but my journey is long from over. My diabetes is under control with my lowest blood sugar readings ever and my aches and pains are no longer weight related; they're exercise related. While I'm still single I hold on to the hope that perhaps the changes I'm making will eventually lead to some new relationship down the road. Every day is a challenge but I've had a lot of wonderful support from family, friends and even complete strangers. I know that I can get the job done. After all, my life depends on it.

Rugby Day

High School Rugby
Originally uploaded by *Bundy*

This past Saturday I had the pleasure to attend my old high school where the newly renovated track and field were dedicated after years of disrepair.

I graduated from the school in 1987 and the track was in bad shape then. The football field was also quite a mess having been torn up by many different sports over the years. At times the middle of the field didn't even have any grass on it.

That all changed recently when a movement grew to replace the old track with a new one and to sod the field. After all of the fund raising was complete and the work had been finished I was pleased with what I saw when I visited.

The track is as good as any track in the Province with a proper surface and eight lanes. There is also a new shot-put and discus area along with spots for other field events. It looks amazing and should last for many years.

The field, where I spent most of my time playing football and rugby looks terrific with new sod. I'm sure it still hurts if you get tackled hard to the ground but it's less dusty now and a bit softer when a scrum collapses and your head gets driven into the ground. That was the one and only time where I actually came up seeing triple.

I don't play rugby anymore but it was nice to be able to take my camera with me and photograph some of the exhibition game action that day. Both the girls and boys teams played.

Both teams have dominated the sport going back to when I played and it's nice to see the tradition continue. Perhaps with the new track in place the high school track & field team will see a resurgence in success as well.

I Blame The Maple Leafs

It's all finally making sense to me. It has now become crystal clear why in the middle of April and well into Spring, it feels this cold. It's actually -3C at this very moment as I type this. Hell has finally frozen over and all the blame falls squarely on those damn Toronto Maple Leafs.

Last night for the first time in something like 30 years (okay it's more like eight years) the Toronto Maple Leafs officially qualified for the playoffs.

Now I won't make excuses by reminding everyone that this is a shortened season and the Leafs are notorious for collapsing during the second half of a normal season which would usually start around this time. I don't mean April, I mean after this number of games played. So they certainly had that going in their favour.

While I'm not a Toronto fan (that's an understatement, I hate the Leafs) I am happy to see my many friends, who happen to be Leafs fans, thrilled by ending the post-season appearance drought.

But I caution the Blue & White faithful, don't start planning any parades just yet. Getting to the playoffs is one thing but winning the Stanley Cup is another beast all-together. Playoff hockey is entirely different from regular season hockey and only the best of the best or the hottest team peaking at the right time will get to hoist Lord Stanley's Cup when it's all over. Sixteen wins is all it takes but they never come easy.

Of course anything is possible once you make the playoffs. But I'd bet the Stanley Cup drought will continue for Toronto this year. For those keeping track, this would be 46 years since the Leafs last won the Stanley Cup should they fail to do it this year. To put that into perspective, I turn 45 this summer, so I wasn't even alive the last time they won. I have however been alive long enough to see my beloved Montreal Canadiens win the Cup a total of nine times. That doesn't include the cup they won just before I was born. I thought I'd mention that.

Bring on the Playoffs!!

Happy Easter

Just wanted to make a quick update to wish everyone a very Happy Easter weekend!

I admit I'm not an overly religious person and while I understand the purpose of this holiday, I'm much more interested in the chocolaty goodness the weekend brings.

Even though I'm working on losing weight, Christmas, Easter and Thanksgiving are the holidays where I allow myself to eat a bit more "stuff" than I typically would during the year. I don't call it cheating. It's more like planned fatty ingestion. I just have to work a little harder and eat a little less in the days that follow.

Actually, I don't eat a lot of chocolate. I usually have one bunny spread out over a few days. Yes, even at my age, I still love me a bunny. I'd prefer she was blonde with a sexy young body and being covered in chocolate would be a bonus but instead I'm just stuck with the store bought typical version

Any way, I digress.

Have a wonderful Easter everyone!

Sorry NHL, All Not Forgotten

This shortened NHL season is quickly coming to an end with about 20 games left at this point. The season was shortened some of you may recall due to the lockout and subsequent butting of rich guy heads. On the one side you had the owners who are mega rich and the other side the players who aren't all equally rich but certainly well paid.

Left out in the cold were the fans. People like you and me who shell out our hard earned cash to attend games and buy merchandise of our favourite teams. My team being the Montreal Canadiens of course.

I won't sit here and pretend I'm still all bitter and refuse to watch the games because that just isn't the case and I'm sure for the majority the anger over the lockout has subsided. Sure I've let go of the resentment I had towards these wealthy individuals who made a mockery of the world greatest game. I'm no longer angry at those people. I'm angry at myself for just accepting it and moving on as if nothing happened.

We were denied one of our winter passions for far too long and in the end we the fans got nothing once the game returned. Oh sure, we got to see our boys back on the ice hitting, fighting and scoring but while the owners and players reaped the rewards of an extended summer break and a new deal, the fans saw nothing significant as a gesture to say sorry.

In all honesty, what could they have done? What grand gesture would have smoothed things over with the NHL fan base and appeased the masses enough to forgive and forget? Probably nothing and the NHL knew that. They also knew the fans would come back. Well, they came back in the arenas where they always show up. The non-hockey market teams continue to see more empty seats than filled.

Carey Price & PK Subban celebrate another win.

This fan is glad the NHL is back but I haven't forgotten their selfishness and disrespect for the people whom without their support, these players and some owners wouldn't have their wealth or comfortable living. I still tune in every game to watch my Habs in action and luckily this season so far Montreal is having a good showing sitting in first place in the East Conference. But one thing I haven't done this season is buy tickets to games, subscribe to the Center Ice package or purchase NHL team merchandise like I have in the past. I refuse to spend any of my small income on anything that will directly fund the owners, players or league.

I realize my one small gesture won't make a difference on the bottom line of these greedy owners but if I just continued on as I have in the past, then I'd just be giving them a free pass as if nothing had ever happened and I couldn't live with that. There has to be consequences with someone wrongs you and no matter how small the gesture, it helps me to justify continuing to enjoy the game I've loved my entire life.